Aug 13, 2009

Starbuck's






STARBUCKS

I don’t really understand how I got addicted to Starbucks, but somehow I did..I really think they put something in the coffee. I go to Starbucks 3 times a day, in the morning, noon and on the way home. I am a local, once I was voted Vancouver’s hottest single in the local paper, Georgia Straight. The staff at Starbucks posted it by the washroom on the pin board. “Meet our local single of the week” Nice by the can…Ghesh says a lot about what they say behind closed doors!!!

I took a few date’s there I had met over the internet, and the staff will always give me my coffee free on those occasions. My favorite barista will wait to see if the guy offers to pay, both times my dates did not. I get the look…
The next day, I will be sure to hear, Kay seriously he’s firkin out. Loser!!

The Starbuck’s I normally go to has the worst parking known to man, I have a little car and will anker my car sideways by the exit, this pisses customers off, there is like a 2 car space for them to go around, however every second morning I get the finger or screamed at…I just laugh and try to start my day off reasonably good. One day however a man took off his Chinese slipper and actually hit my car, I had the window down and had the please of spit on my face in his foreign tongue. I do keep a watch out for that small man..he scares me!

I remember on the way to Starbucks there was a contest on the radio; it said call right now with something funny and off the top of your head and you could win…
I called in and said I had farted in a huge line at Starbuck’s. I thought it was pretty funny; I never got a call back.

I gave tickets to the big sex tradeshow Taboo to the girls at Starbucks, and gifts, they all look overworked and tired in the morning. I figured a good dildo could cure this and looking at sexy naked men, they were soo excited-I never heard about the details thou. Damm!

On one date the guy was very cute in his profile we agreed to do a Chapters Date, instead of the cost of dinner you spend it on books-I thought this was great idea. Until I picked him up, and he was 200 pounds heaver than his photo, I thought Id do the date anyway, the guy was charming and actually very attractive. Off we go to Starbucks!! First of course, we will do the test…”Will he pay for the double 6 dollar latte?” I think they were all shocked, I am a tiny girl of about 100lbs, we look like the odd couple. Once again the man did not offer to pay for my coffee.

After the date he asked which picture on his profile he should use for his début release of his album, I said 2nd from the last, and if you like Id be happy to do grouse mountain with you so you look like that again. Well I got quite the email, telling me I was a superficial bitch and to never call him again. Whoa, the price of being honest.

Starbucks has pulled me through thick and thin, I write, draw study and sometimes pick up men there-actually I have never,just another romantic fantasy, but who really wants a man from Starbuck’s!

Now I sit here, trying to do the latte experiment on becoming an instant millionaire. It will break my heart that Starbucks may have to leave me. Starbucks is the deadly link to negative things I do also, like smoking which is ending today hopefully.
Tears of hardship, crying in my car, with a cup of Starbucks. Bad dates a Starbuck's in hand!

The other day my son told me his analogy of Starbuck’s…the beautiful picture on the cup is actually a mythological creature called a Siren. Who lure’s you in with her song n dance and then eats you alive. Not bad I thought.

I will go back and use Starbucks as my desk for creativity one day, and what will I buy? A water to donate money for the children in Africa and a flax seed bar, these day’s it’s the only thing I can afford for my personal detox to the toilet

Cheers to you, Starbucks!

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